What Charlie Sheen taught us about marketing

There is a lot going on in the world in terms of pop culture, politics and the great global community. The Oscars, TED, John Galliano, Wisconsin, Gaddafi, Texas Independence… the list goes on and on. But let’s be real for a minute – the only thing we’re totally absorbed with is a psychotic star from a CBS TV show we’ve never even seen.

Unless you’re living underneath a rock in the Mariana Trench and hanging out with fish that have light bulbs attached to their foreheads, you have been inundated with the insanity that is Charlie Sheen. And while it’s fun to sit around and laugh at his outrageous antics, the Black Sheep have put this maelstrom of quotability to good use – and you can too.

Get ready to start WINNING. (It rhymes with “winning.” Duh.)

1. “I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.”In this quote, our loony friend lets us know how great he is. But you do really awesome stuff all of the time, too, right? Talk about it. Share your company’s successes on social media, and if it’s big enough, with the press. It’s best to be humble about it (sorry, Charlie), but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be proud and seize the opportunity to give your company a little bit of deserved spotlight.
2. “You’ve read about the goddesses, come on. They’re an international sensation. These are my girlfriends. These are the women that I love that have completed the three parts of my heart.” This quote, which references Charlie’s unconventional lifestyle, does not equivocate, and we have to give him props for his transparency – however ill-advised his choices may be. Charlie Sheen doesn’t make excuses, and he always says what’s on his mind. When you run a company, that’s really important. Of course, making good decisions should ALWAYS come first. Perhaps he has something to learn from us too? Nah…
3. “I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA.”Clearly, this sounds like something that would be said by a very imaginative five-year-old, but he makes an interesting point. We’ve suggested it a million times – just not as “eloquently” as ol’ Chuck. Don’t be afraid to try something new and to stand out, especially when it comes to marketing. Just because it has been done a certain way for 5, 10 or 100 years, doesn’t mean it’s right. Go out on a limb even if you feel a little ridiculous, and don’t back down when you start to get noticed. Adonis DNA not required.
4. “Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words – imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists.” Communication is the heart of any company or campaign, and the words you choose can make or break you. Select them wisely, avoiding clichés and fluff, and your message will be heard loud and clear, whether it’s on social media, in a press release or on your website. Fire-breathing fists should only be used on special occasions.
5. “Don’t be special, be one of us. Newsflash: I am special, and I will never be one of you!” Charlie Sheen is “special” because he’s crazy (and apparently has tiger blood, as mentioned above), and you have whatever sets you apart from your competition. Maybe it’s a new technology or a more delicious pizza or a cure for the common cold. We all have our “thing.” Use your differences to distinguish yourself in your marketplace and make sure your messaging is clear. If you follow the path of everyone else, you’ll likely get lost in the shuffle.

Obviously, Charlie Sheen is not the typical role model. And seriously, kids, don’t do drugs. But there is something to be said for staying true to who you are and not being afraid to turn a few heads. And if it takes a warlock on a mercury surfboard to convince you, so be it.